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Children say the darndest things... |
A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question, "Boys and girls, what do we know about God?"A hand shot up in the air. "He is an artist!", said the kindergarden boy. "Really? How do you know?", the teacher asked. "You know, Our Father who does art in heaven..." | |
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Following the law |
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Somebody once figured out that we have 35 million laws trying to enforce 10 Commandments. | |
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Special Delivery |
There was this gracious lady mailing an old family Bible to her brother in another part of the country."Is there anything breakable in here?", asked the Postal clerk. "Only the Ten Commandments!" | |
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Two Kinds of People |
"Somebody has well said there are only two kinds of people in the world...There are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord," and there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good Lord, it's morning." | |
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Building fund |
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There is the story of a pastor who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation: "I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets." | |
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B.I.B.L.E. |
A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!"His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means?" The son replied, "I do know!" "Okay, said his father. "So, son, what does the Bible mean?" "That's easy, Daddy. It stands for 'Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.'" | |
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Oh say can you see? |
The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to, after the worship service, ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in at the last minute.The substitute wanted to know what to play. "Here's a copy of the service," he said impatiently. "But you'll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances." During the service, the minister paused and said, "Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected, and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100 or more, please stand up." At that moment, the substitute organist played "The Star
Spangled Banner." And that is how the substitute became the regular organist!! | | | | Site setup by: Michael Salone hjbraeseke@aol.com 1925 N 60th Ave Hollywood FL 33021 United States of America Phone: (954) 989-1766 |
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